I’m suffering a bad case of blogger’s block. I’m in a rut. I can’t even think about what to write about, let alone what to actually write.
I’m not even sure what I want this blog to be about – or who I want to read it. I know I should do one of those “ideal reader” exercises but that would be just another excuse not to write.
I need to write. When I don’t write, my brain gets clogged up with lots of random crap and I feel myself getting frustrated and annoyed. It’s also annoying because I started this blog when I started my career change because after years of being restricted about what I could write about due to my job. Suddenly I was free to write about whatever I wanted to write about. The irony – now that I can finally write about anything, I can’t think of anything to write.
I need to write because while suffering writer’s block with this blog isn’t really a big deal, I should be writing for my business blog and for a women’s networking organisation I’m a part of. At least for those blogs, I have a target audience and some guidelines on topics.
So, what am I doing while I’m not writing. Well, I have developed an unhealthy addiction to Nashville (damn you Netflix for allowing me to continue straight to Season 2 – and hurry up and get the next two)! I guess my Dad did play a lot of country music in my childhood….
I’m stuck on level 120 of the Inside Out Thought Bubbles game. I originally downloaded this for the boys because we loved the movie so much and now we’re all playing it. Evening conversations go – “so how was your day, what level are you on?” For the first time ever, I’ve consulted the internet for tips – but as the levels get harder, I am getting bored so hopefully I’ll get over it soon.
I’m getting excited and stressed about heading off to Canberra, Wollongong and Sydney in just under 2 weeks. Excited because I can’t wait to see family and friends but a little stressed about what needs to be done before then – teacher gifts, early birthday party for our Christmas Day baby, catch-ups with friends, a house inspection, and lots of cooking. And I’m not even worrying about shopping until we get over there.
On that note, where did the year go? I think part of my anxiety about what needs to be done in the next few weeks is the realisation that the year is almost over and that my business is likely to hit a quiet period, just as I’m starting to build up contacts and networks. On the upside, this is good motivation to put some things in place over the next few weeks so I can enjoy a few weeks off.
Finally, I think the fires close to us last Wednesday have probably unsettled me and many around me. While I monitored the fire throughout the day, I really didn’t expect it would get so close and that I’d be hearing a catastrophic fire warning for our town as I picked the boys up. While we were lucky that we didn’t have to evacuate, we did start getting things together and came to the scary realisation that we were ill-prepared – no battery powered radio, one torch and not enough hoses. I was blown away by how calm the boys were and how much they knew about fires from school and from visits from the local country and metropolitan fire services.
As a 20 year old, I had bags packed of letters and keepsakes. On Wednesday, looking round the house at all our beautiful things collected over the years, I felt like everything was irreplaceable but that didn’t mean we could take it all. At the end of the day, the pictures, rugs, ornaments and photos are just things. Packing this time it was about some changes of clothes, the boys’ special toys, negatives, the hard drive and some jewelry. As long as we were together and safe, that was all that mattered.
Knowing we have friends who are volunteer fire fighters and who were evacuated has made this disaster all the more real. The outpouring of community assistance has been amazing and in many cases, relief centres are already overwhelmed with donations. I was glad to have a friend who works in one of the affected areas and I could at least send a few bags of groceries up with her on Friday. It doesn’t feel like much but hopefully communities will continue to help out when they can – and for the long road ahead as people rebuild.
I had not plan when I started tapping on the keyboard today. I just wanted to write something because once you start writing, it gets easier.
So, for the next 24 days, as the boys open their advent calendars counting down to Christmas, I’m going to write. One blog every day for the next 24 days. I’m not promising it will be exciting, or insightful or even funny, but bear with me – who knows what might come out.
And if you like what you’re reading, please leave a comment and share with your friends.